It isnt too often that i really enjoy my break or even that my breaks are very eventful, but this one was full of surprises. Many ups and downs, but more importantly I realized how lucky I am now.
So it goes like this…
Thursday: I was on duty for until most of the morning, but was welcomed home in the late afternoon. From there it was from one lola’s house to the next. Each with some awesome food whether it be homecooked boston market or just regular homecooked food. The only thing that really mattered to me was the fact that I got to spend time with my family. It was a break I really needed and spending time with the my fam is something I really value because even through the tough times on my dads side with my cousin, at the end of the day we are still blood and we have each others back. My moms side is always a blast because even if its just a few of us spending time watching the game, we always have a fun and definately laugh until our tummies hurt.
Friday: My mom got married this day and I have to admit I do not have many bad days, but this was definately one of the worst mornings I’ve ever had. First of all I did not like the ceremony in which my mom got married. It was a strict Indian wedding and to be honest I don’t have anything against their ceremonies, but it just was not my own. I sat there and grinned through the whole thing to make my mom happy. To make matters worse I found out some really surprising news about my past affiliations and to be honest I was mad/dissapointed. In that same token I realized how great my close friends are and that they can cheer me up no matter how big of a funk I am in. All I really have to say about this situation is that, hey do what you want to do, it isnt my life to be a part of anymore because where I am at now is a place I didn’t even know I could be. Also, I apologize for thinking what I thought about you and assuming what I thought to be true. The initial shock eventually subsided and one thing my friends kept telling me really stuck. All they kept telling me is don’t worry about it, look at what you have now and how beautiful it is. For that I thank them so much. The day passed and the wedding reception came and well it was an open bar. My closest friends + my crazy cousins = one memorable night. I may not have had the best morning, but I definately had a night to remember. Congrats to my mom and my stepdad. I won’t call you stepdad or dad ever, but as long as you keep my mom happy you’ll be ok in my book.
Saturday: Whenever a guy gets into a relationship with a girl he just doesnt date her. Nope, he dates her and all her closest girlfriends. I met up with Alyssa and one of her closest friends Cathy. The only thought I had in my mind is that I want Cathy to approve of me dating Alyssa. Legid, I was just myself and it surprised me, how many laughs we had and things we enjoyed. From the food to the movies and finally the dessert. This day was truly fun and hey she did approve of me =)
Sunday: Came back to reality that is Stony Brook and now I have so much to do in this upcoming week, but hell I was never one to complain. It never did solve anything so I thought hey! Just shut up and do work. No complaining and definately no whinning. Everything on my plate is something that I asked for so here we go!
Sidenote: I never really understood when people told me that you wont find someone special if you go looking. It didnt make sense, how do you find someone you arent looking for? However, this past month has proven and shown me so much that I now understand what people mean when say you find it when you dont look. I wasnt even looking for you, but I am damn sure thankful and lucky to have you in my life.
Holy crap i actually finished a blog… hahaha ok peace!
Once again in class and super bored so I’m going to talk about something that is on my mind. If your bored and have nothing to do pelase feel free to comment and read on =)
So the topic of envy is very vast and abundant. You can envy a person in almost any and every way. A person has a hot gf, you envy the fact that he gets to go home with that at the end of the day. A person has a lot of expensive clothes and material things, you wish you could have those things in your closet. Someone has a BMW and you find yourself starring at it from the seat of a bus. I could go on and on and I’m sure you could to.
I have a question for people who read this though.
Would you envy an autistic person?
To be honest I would envy them in various ways. Yes all the materialistic things may not be there, but when your autistic do you even care? Yes, I understand that life could be seen as handicapped and sad and that you will always need to be taken care of by someone and blah blah blah. I started to think about other things besides all the negatives of being autistic and thought of how lucky those people are.
Since the time we could walk and talk we were told to live by a code of rules set by society. To have an unwritten edict around others. For example, classic phrases such as if you don’t have anything nice to say dont say it at all, or treat others the way you want to be treated. Even now as I thought of this I imagined that if you didn’t follow these rules your life would be full of great loneliness and strife.
This is why I envy autistic people. To not have to follow the rules of society and hide behind the fakeness of faces. Everyone lies one way or another and if someone is not saying something to your face, you can bet that they are thinking of it a thousand times over. However, an autistic person doesn’t hold back on what they have to say and just come out to say it. Initially you would think that this would alienate many people from them, but I doubt it will because since they are “autistic” they can do so. Being autistic is not a complete crutch. It comes with the ability to be truly brutally honest all the time.
So yea thats all thats on my mind for now lol please let me know what you think and what your take on envy is.
Ok so i should be paying attention in class but instead I feel like doing this lol
There has been so much work in my life that in my opinion work is no longer work.
WORK IS LIFE.
This is a sad truth that I have come to realize but who is to blame?
NO one but myself. Now i sound like I’m bitchin’ don’t get me wrong. I’m not.
Why do we work? - Besides the blah blah blah reason of oh i want a good job, have a good life later, have stability, blah blah blah.
You work your entire life to have security in your later life but what is a life that you spend trying to be happy for just a little while. College is spent doing hours of work, but even then there are times where you feel like you fail.
Why do you think we work so much?
My opinion: Life is all about that dream. Have a wife, kids, and that dream house. A perfect life filled with many imperfections before it. Sadly, most people never achieve that dream of a perfect life they want. We work to try and obtain something that many strive for but few ever find. So if we never find it what do we end up doing? settle? deal with what we got? I do not believe that this is the case.
I believe that we work, work as hard as we can to come as close to perfection as we can until we feel like we have done everything we can. Now in your dream you may have had a different idea as to what perfection is and what your life should be. Life isn’t a dream and it never will be, but what I have found is that we can get damn close to what that dream is and succeed regardless. We work to become the best we can and if its anything less then what we want then it is our falter.
Achieve a “perfect dream” through an imperfect reality.
THIS IS WHY I BELIEVE WE WORK.
A friend told me once that you should always push as hard as you can. When you feel like you’ve pushed as far as you can, you have a little more left in you so push HARDER.
That simple line is something that has kept me going for a while and probably forever.
Don’t complain about what is going on in your life because you are blessed no matter what you think. Take what you got and own it until you master it. Work towards perfection.
-do you stare while you kiss??
- umm no. im more of a closed eye kiss person.
-favorite harry potter book/movie??
- dont really read the books, not a big fan of them. I did enjoy the latest movie though! I want to know what happens next
http://www.formspring.com/forms/?786120-Or1ANx9Yw3 feel free to ask me anything!
-when are we getting more nomoms?
-i am always down to get food, all you gotta do is text me hehe
-What’s the most interesting thing or situation in your life right now?
-hhhmm idk i guess it would be the break and the things im doing while im on break =) still wna snowboarding though
-favorite song to sing in the shower =D
-hhhmm idk really lol whatever song is stuck in my head
-LOL DO YU LIKEZ HOTDAWGZ.
-grays papaya. thats all.